Working Mother and Child in Creche effects: In this era of nuclear family, the biggest pain of today’s working mother is to keep her small children away from herself in a crèche for 10-11 hours. These innocent children crying after leaving their mother may not be able to tell that they only want their mother at any cost, but their behavior raises many questions. Both the mother and the child bear this stress of distance and this is the reason why mothers are often worried about whether this is oppression of the child? Will the child, who is facing the pain and stress of separation from the mother at such a young age, become mentally weak in future or will it not have an even worse effect?

On this dilemma of working mothers News18hindi by Dr. Rajesh Sagar, Professor, Department of Psychiatry, All India Institute of Medical Sciences, New Delhi Have talked to. Let us know with expert advice whether mothers of children living in crèche need to take tension or not?

Dr. Rajesh Sagar says, ‘See, it is true that the child needs the mother the most and when he is separated from the mother, the word used for it is separation anxiety. This happens especially when the child who has been living at home since the beginning goes to school for the first time, he cries, gets upset and sometimes becomes irritable. In such a situation, separation anxiety is an important condition. However, a school going child is 4-5 years old.

But if children younger than that are left in a crèche, the risk of mental stress may increase. Because the child going to crèche is very young and does not get the emotional support he should get from the mother, then the mental health of such children can be affected. They may be mentally weak. However, it is not necessary that this problem occurs in all children.

Are there any symptoms seen in mentally disturbed children?
Some children are fragile and have risk factors for mental health issues. So some symptoms may be seen in them. Like crying a lot, being irritable, sometimes becoming aggressive, avoiding food, being loose, lethargic or sick etc. This behavior comes because you have separated him from his mother. But it is also seen that children behave like this more in the beginning but when the child starts adjusting, it gradually reduces.

Are such children more likely to become victims of mental illnesses in the future?
See, this does not happen in everyone, but some children who are easy to hurt, that is, who feel insecure very quickly and do not mix with everyone, then such children may be at risk of mental health issues. Apart from this, multiple factors can also be responsible for this.

Can this problem always happen?
No, it is not necessary that the child who is crying, upset and stressed while going to the crèche today will remain like this in future also. As the child socializes, this problem may reduce and can be cured with some efforts. However, some children may be an exception to this.

Does staying away from mother have any good effect?
Yes absolutely. Separating the child for some time from the mother or rather a safe environment is also necessary for the development of the child. Because children who are completely dependent on their mother, their nature and behavior continues to be dependent on this basis. That’s why sometimes it is beneficial because being separated from the mother a little gives him strength and he learns survival. Individualization can come in it and a little bit of it can start from a young age also. That is why it is important to have balance.

The child is with the mother for 14 hours, 10 hours away, so is this normal?
Since 10 hours is a long time, it is important that the caretaker of the place where the child is staying works as a co-mother. This distance can be compensated by taking care of the child, bonding with him and making him comfortable.

As far as the ratio of 10 and 14 hours is concerned, we cannot say that children should not be kept in crèches, because due to this everyone will panic, will be afraid of keeping the child and will start leaving work. So here it can be said that for children who are a little sensitive or sensitive, distance from their mother is difficult.

How to recognize that a child is delicate? Are there any symptoms?

There are many factors in this. The child has to be assessed. The biggest thing is that every child is different, hence the same thing cannot be said for everyone. Some children get easily shaken by meeting anyone, some children will start crying after seeing others. Some children will behave as if it is okay and will not enjoy your company much. So those who are delicate may face problems but their numbers are less.

Every mother can know better about this. She can find out how her child feels safe and happy. How much his behavior is changing, how he is behaving while eating and drinking. Has his sleep cycle been disrupted? Has he become irritable? Or he is not responding at all. If he goes away, for how long does he remain troubled and after how much time does he get well, all these things should be noted by the mother.

What to believe if a child cries the whole day and is falling ill again and again?

See, if the child is crying and crying continuously then it means that he is uncomfortable somewhere. If the child is falling ill again and again, it could also be a symptom of his discomfort. It is necessary to assess such a child.

What should working mothers do?
Since a mother is forced to keep her child away, she should try to spend as much quality time as possible with the child. We call this attachment bond, which the child has with the mother. Keep in mind that just counting the hours spent with the child is not enough, children should feel that you are with them. You play with the child, do all those things with him which he is happy doing. Stay away from phone, TV or distractions while staying with the child. Satisfy the child. This can compensate for those 10 hours.

What should a mother do if there is no improvement in the child?
If despite efforts with the child, his health, behavior and nature are not improving, he is still becoming lethargic, sad or aggressive and irritable, and is falling ill again and again, then parents can seek help from any pediatric psychologist.